A few of the blogs I read have posted items on "keeping it real". I guess this topic could enter that field...
3 full months after my documents were sent to Russia, it's not uncommon for family and friends (especially those I don't see everyday) to ask "any news yet?" or "what's the latest?" or more specifically, "got the referral yet?". I have to say, I LOVE and at the same time, HATE these questions! I know that sounds silly and bratty and contradictory all wrapped up in one spoiled package.
This whole adoption business is a roller coaster of emotions. While my timeline is by no means the longest, there are families who for a variety of reason wait for years, with no major "issues" holding families back, it's hard to sit here and wait, wait, wait. It's frustrating knowing that there are (as reported many places) 600,000 - 700,000 orphans in Russia in need of homes and tick tock, tick tock, tick tock, here I sit. (I have warned you that I have no patience!!)
Watching other families celebrate their referrals is WONDERFUL, but it also brings home the realization that you are still waiting. Rumors fly on the adoption community forum message boards that some agencies are offering "instant" referrals for boys. The economy hits adoptive families too - and rumors are there are fewer now than "other times".
So please, keep asking the questions! I LOVE everyone showing their interest in my journey, but now you'll know why you may hear exasperation in my voice! It's not aimed at you, honest!!
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8 comments:
Believe me I understand your feelings. We spent months and months in a Vietnam program watching families with other agencies getting referrals while our agency got none. I understand your frustration! I wrote a post a while back about second guessing and I think that's what we do a lot, wondering if we had chosen differently, would we be home with our child by now. Try to hang in there, it WILL happen.
After spending a year trying to get pregnant for my 1st, I know EXACTLY what you mean!! And also, you forgot to mention that when people don't ask (even though you know they just don't want to bug you) there is part of you that wonders "Don't they even want to know?!?!?!" Well, just get used to the roller coaster --- because being a Mom is like a daily emotion wringer that carrys no explanation whatsoever!!!! Hang in there Wing!!!!
I completely understand what you're saying!
I hear ya. I get so tired of saying, 'No new news, not yet, hopefully soon, etc.' I know it will eventually happen, but why does the waiting have to be so hard?! Hang in there!
Its all up to God and his plan for you. Patience, dear friend. It will happen when the time is right for both of you.
Its divine intervention that will bring you and baby boy together, just let it happen.
and yes, I'm waiting JUST as hard as you are.
Like everyone else, I TOTALLY understand your feelings. It is nice to know that people care, but it sometimes feels like that is all they have to talk about. Sometimes I'd like to have a T-shirt that says "no news yet, please don't ask!" Hang in there, sweetie, and know that I'm praying for you!
Oh, Dear Amy, I am afraid that when you were suppose to learn patience as a little girl, you were hanging out with me. I have so little patience! One friend told me in college that patience was a virtue. I told her that it was one that I was never going to have. If it gets too much, just tell people you will reveal it on this blog when you get one and hopefully they will quit bugging you.
Pamela
Hugs Mamacita!
I'm waiting with you too.....and I'm here for you.....all the way!
You are so much braver than I am....you HAVE to go first!
Praying for you and baby boy to meet very soon!
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